Third Times A Tangled Web

Spider-Man 3


My bad graphics sense is tingling.




Fun: C-


Features: N/A


Graphics: F Graphics? HA! This game doesn't even have Spidey's suit right!


Controls: C+


Multiplayer:N/A


AI: C


Repetitive Value: D


Depth: B-


Music: F


Presentation: C+


Level Design: B- At least the city is cool for the most part.


Single Player: C+



Overall: D-




Folks, one piece of advice for everyone who's doing late VG holiday shopping this year , DO-NOT-BUY-MOVIE-RELATED-GAMES. I don't know if it's just me, but nearly all of them SUCK. This year I, and every Spider-Man fan were shocked that this was also going to be put out with our daily waste. There is only ONE whole MRGS that I don't give to Game Crazy and hope for my money back (the little-), and that is (DUNDIDEDUNDUN) Spider-Man. If you want proof go play Spider-Man 2 and you'll see what I mean. But anyway, lets get nitty-gritty with this game shall we?


Well, the game was presented like any other MRGS game would, showing how to move, shoot webs, in a area totally untrue to the movie, blahblahblah. But I noticed I felt a bit darkened by the whole theme of the level, flames, dark color scheme, and about 90% of the time you were fighting the H-Bombers in their attempt to level a building. It just didn't seem like the ambiance we felt in Spider-Man 2. Maybe in coordination with the movie?



Speaking of the movie, this time, (and this version) the movie is put in more than any other Spider-Man game, the only "exclusives" being Mobius & Shriek and The Lizard. Other than that, that's it for the movie differences, but I can't help feeling disappointed at the lack of effort to make the rest of the game live up to the Marvel legacy.

And by "live up" I mean to point out the the abysmal GRAPHICS that this game has to offer. Yeah, not something this series stands for period. Going on a roof tour anytime soon? Then stop by the Empire State Building, go ALL the way up, and admire the clay buildings. They're cool, huh (cough cough)? All the characters look and sound like a dog with rabies ate them for breakfast and had a second helping of vocal cords and skin. If Tobey Maguire was singing on a mic, the sound waves would look like Donald Trump scribbling on a piece of paper for fun. Do the public gardeners do a bad job of trimming the grass in Central Park, or has Spidey shrunk? Did the lazy people at Vicarious Visions forget to color a WEAPON?!?! Wait a minute... did that thug just go through the CEILING? How come I walked off the building- AND I'M STILL ON THERE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Honestly, V.V., if you want to put out a game with all these graphical disgraces, expect a lawsuit from either Marvel, or US, on your doorstep in the near future.


Ayeayeaye, will this ride on the American Eagle ever END? Wait it gets better, the black suit rips the game even more out of whack. It doesn't just make Spidey look like he just took an overdose of measles medicine, it turns the already babyish fights into melted butter. They've made the most important thing in the movie into a thing that rips the fun of this game to ribbons. Lets see, you get to use it, hmm, about a minute after you take it off. And when you put it back on, you're ready to beat ton after ton after ton after ton of snot out of the Dragontails, all over again. In fact, I was so glad when the time came to ditch it forever I danced in my shoes and honked a bicycle horn in celebration. Then when I beat the game, I screamed in horror at the fact that you can get it BACK!!!! NOOOOOO!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, whew, I thought I was going to pass out. Huh, huh, is there anything I can say about this game that will lower my adrenaline? Yes, and it's still not good news. back into the topic of the depression factor. There is one other horrid thing the symbiote does if you wear it for too long, besides feeding off the poor spider, it makes Manhattan Island look like a giant broke wind on it. Cracked streets, polluted skies, fractures on the box buildings, and dead trees to name a few. Now you might understand why I gave the graphics a F.

I'm so enraged at the packages this game failed to deliver, that I don't even WANT to go on with my soul crushing criticism. Instead, I'll end my review with the fact that V.V. is extremely lucky I played the nice guy and let it have a D- as my final grade, 'cause I'm REALLY mad!



Quick Review: 2.9


Pros: I didn't swear in my full review.

Cons: The graphics in this game are a total disgrace to the next-gen of games. Better luck next time guys.